My Move To LA

This post doesn't have much to do with LA although I have had some new experiences here that I need to write about in a later post.

This post is mostly a complaint. While I am fortunate to have a job my job has digressed into doing things I've never wanted to do. Most recently I've been tasked with starting a line of soap for my boss. Yes, soap. It's the whole reason I went to school for architecture, worked in an architecture firm, taught drafting and architecture at a community college and built up an entire portfolio of work based on architecture. Soap.

I guess it's my fault for never doing anything but a great job with everything I've ever been asked to do here.

"Dominic, help design a walkout basement extension for that famous super model, make sure it passes code even though she's not allowed to build another square foot of habitable space on her property and model it in 3D for a presentation to her next week."

"Consider it done."

"Dominic, here are 15 pictures of pieces of furniture that I want to have built and delivered before for my showroom opening in three weeks. Make sure it gets done."

"You got it."

"Dominic, I want to add an interactive furniture section to my website in addition to updating the candle and fabric photos and their descriptions. Make it happen."

"Of course."

"Dominic, here's a picture of me dressed in a Santa suit. I want this to be the company christmas card. Get 200 of them printed for less than $300 by the end of the week and have shipped to me in London."

"I'll do it right now."

"Dominic, type up the invitation for my birthday party with Elton as I dictate it to you and wait while I find every celebrity contact in my blackberry." (I didn't get invited)

"Ready when you are."

"Dominic, pick this up for me because it's too heavy." (This one my boss isn't guilty of. Only other coworkers).

"Where shall I put it?"

Architecture seems to be getting further and further away... Or maybe I just really don't want to deal with soap today.

Since our last earthquake report, there has been a lot of tectonic activity in our region. Shortly after the main quake on Sunday there were dozens of aftershocks, which is to be expected. What we did not expect, however, was another largish shock.

On Tuesday at around 3:40 there was another quake measuring 4.1 which I felt while I was alone in my classroom. Our emergency team announced it over the intercom and asked that we do a quick sweep of the building to make sure everything was okay. Everything was fine. Everything, except my blood-pressure, that is.

The experts are calling it an aftershock but having two significant events in a row has put some people (like myself) on edge. I planned to keep my fears quiet because, as a newbie to this, I tend to overreact. As I was trying to get my heart rate back to normal, a colleague of mine came in the room to see if everything was okay. I eeked out a "fine". As she began telling me how frightening that was. So much for deep breathing techniques.

My colleague went on to say that even if this isn't a "warning" of something to come she and her husband have upped their emergency preparedness. Their family now has earthquake kits at home and in all their cars, as well as enough food and water for a week. We have...a flashlight.

This weekend, which we hope will not be too late, the Filosas are getting their california act in gear and putting together an emergency plan. Also, we should probably find out where we put that flashlight.

Last night we felt our third significant earthquake. I feel the need to report about it here to be informative as well as for posterity. This earthquake, with a magnitude of 5.0, was quite a jolt. Unlike other quakes we've felt this one was intensely strong and then dissipated, where others built in intensity.

Our previous experiences (all two of them) told our brains that the quake would get stronger so I was pretty frightened for a moment. We jumped up from the dinner table and I said "drop and cover!" (my school's emergency training kicking in) but by the time we reacted the quake had dissipated. So we walked out to the balcony to see our pool sloshing, which was really cool.

All my geeky research explains that the difference in each earthquakes is the depth at which it originates. A shallow quake, like this one, produces a strong jolt that is felt at a smaller radius than a deep quake. Deep quakes, like the one we felt last summer, rumble for miles and miles and can be felt in waves.

Yay earthquakes!

Simple food at amazing prices.

Nicole and I like to eat at Lala's on Melrose before we see a Groundlings show. Each time we've been back we've received the same great service and food. The Argentinians don't waste a lot of time trying to make your food taste like something it's not or distract you from the main dish with frou frou sides. If you get steak, it tastes like steak. If you get chicken, it tastes like chicken. They've got delicious salads, sandwiches and pasta if you're into that but I like to keep it simple. A piece of meat and a side. Bam, that's it, two delicious items on my plate for under $10 (if I go with the chicken). Plus, they've got $3.50 Bud Lights! Delicious.

My other favorite thing about Lala's is the bus staff. I know what you're thinking; if they clear your table promptly how much better can they get? Well, the bussers at Lala's all keep shims in their pockets and are constantly on the lookout for wobbly tables. What's worse than a wobbly table when you have a full beer? Nothing.

Last night we had a drinking party of four and the bill came to $99.00. Suck that New York City!

Lala's Argentine Grill
7229 Melrose Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90046

Last night Nicole and I made a trip down the street to the recently opened Tender Greens restaurant. The Chipotlesque way in which you order your food is cool and after I got over being abused by the girl taking our order (she was completely emotionless and unhelpful) I was shocked to get to the cashier and find that it's $21.00 plus 9.25% tax for two salads. I began to wonder where I was saving money for sacrificing a proper hostess and wait staff (and being abused by the first employee I encountered). They do get two thumbs up however for having microbrews on tap!

For $10.50 my salad was extremely disappointing. I ordered from the "Big Salads" menu and got the Wild Shrimp Ceviche. I didn't know it at the time but Ceviche is a fancy word for raw fish "cooked" (when they really mean just marinated) in lemon or lime juice. I'm a big fan of sushi but ceviche fucking sucks (or at least shrimp ceviche sucks). It was cold, limp, tasteless and looked like part of the afterbirth from one of the Aliens movies when the little alien pops out of the human's chest. I guess it would have been slightly better if the shrimp was actually cooked but not by much. I almost ordered off of the "Simple Salads" menu as I wasn't that hungry but I'm glad I didn't because even the "big" salad wasn't enough.

Nicole ordered the Chinese Chicken Salad from the big menu and while it was pretty delicious it didn't come with enough dressing and her chicken seemed to suffer from the same afterbirth effect as my shrimp. She didn't finish it.

I wish I could base this entire review on the beer but, alas, I cannot. Tender Greens gets two thumbs down this time around. I'll be giving them another shot sometime in the future but for now, please avoid this establishment and go to one of the many other great places easily within walking distance on Santa Monica.

If you're a masochist here's the address:

Tender Greens
8759 Santa Monica Blvd, W. Hollywood, CA 90069

Wow has it been a long time since I've posted. I feel so guilty for letting down the few people that actually come here to read. I could make excuses but I don't want to do that. Please accept my apologies. Nicole and I have decided that we need to post more frequently and with many more pictures!! Please check back soon as I'll be sure to post something interesting.

If the threat of the next big earthquake doesn't scare you away from L.A. the constant threat of toxic air might. It doesn't take a genius to know that jogging with traffic at rush hour is not a good idea, but most of us (geniuses included) ignore the quality of the air until its noticeably bad. Unfortunately, here in LA you kind of grow accustomed to the brown blanket of air above you and only feel its threat when it becomes apocalyptically opaque.

Don't look to the locals for commiseration, they'll tell you to get a grip because at least the air isn't what it used to be. Well, the American Lung Association State of the Air report will tell you that, better or not, LA continues to be one of the most polluted cities in the nation. Yeah, we're all aware of that fact but check out the graphic below and note where the cutoff is for a grade of F.

I'm thinking of wearing a face mask the next time I go outside. Hopefully your city isn't so toxic, check out how it ranks here. And if you're still thinking about moving to LA please consider buying an electric car first, the city can't handle one more ounce of emissions.

I have to be honest, when Dominic first told me we'd be moving to Los Angeles my first thought was "oh my god, we're going to die in an earthquake". I immediately began researching earthquakes but it hardly quelled my fears since all the experts say that the next "Big One" is going to hit in the next 10 years. When I pointed this fact out to my husband his response was "Awesome!"

So here we are approaching our anniversary in earthquake country and I'm actually enjoying the ride. My first earthquake experience was ideal, as it happened I was sitting outside on the ground. Only once did I feel one while inside a building, which is a bit more terrifying as you never know how structurally sound a place is until it actually fails. Now every little bump I feel I run to the USGS's earthquake center, first to check if it was actually a quake and second to proudly add my experience to the site's "did you feel it?" statistics.

Sadly many little quakes go un-felt. Last night a sizable earthquake hit the area and we didn't even know about it until our friends mentioned it at dinner. Its safe to say my fear of earthquakes has subsided, since I actually feel envious if my friends feel a quake and I don't.

Everything you've heard about the superficiality of L.A. is true and even more accurate here in West Hollywood. Our neighbors are all shockingly good looking and unimaginably fit. Even my coworkers -- teachers with hearts of gold, far from "superficial" -- are all beautiful and fit.

And then there's Dominic and I, still carrying around an extra layer-for-warmth that we grew back in Denver. Don't get me wrong, we're beautiful people, just that our beauty is mostly on the inside -- and partially buried by survival layers of fat. I'd hardly ever noticed the fat on our bodies, probably because it was so utilitarian before but more likely because I was just too damn lazy to worry about a little extra squish.

I fully understand that at 109 pounds and 18% body fat I'm far from "fat". But if you were to put me in a bikini and set me out by our pool next to my neighbors who might be wearing even smaller bikinis, I might look like the fattest girl there. Seriously.

While I have no plans (or delusions) of having a cover model body, I have begun to consider the idea of shedding my winter layers. We've already started eating healthier, leaner, whole-r foods and we've even been using our gym memberships (the ones that, up until recently, had only been making our wallets thinner).

If you're considering a move to L.A., you might want to be sure you're not prone to any body image disorders, because if you didn't have one before you will now!

I love comedy and I love even more good stand-up comedy. I've got a few favorite performers which include David Cross, Patton Oswalt, Doug Stanhope, David Alan Grier (most times), Jim Norton and Pablo Francisco (when he was funny).

Nicole and I hadn't been to see a live comedy performance here in LA yet so when Patton Oswalt said he'd be performing at the Largo I was there. The Largo is only five minutes from our place and very near some good restaurants. Nicole and I decided to make a nice date out of it.

A few notes on the Largo:

Ticketing at the Largo is a little weird. First, you can't purchase them online. You've got to call, leave your name and credit card info on their voicemail and then they'll call you back (in a few days) and confirm the order. Then, you've got to show up at the theater at 7:00pm the day of show and wait in a line to receive your seat assignment (the first people there get the best seats). Luckily, we scootered down right at 7:00 and were some of the first few in line. There isn't a ticket window or anything but rather a large wrought iron gate which a guy stands behind and confirms that you're on the list and stamps your hand and gives your seat numbers. He then tells you to return at 8:45 for the show (which is inaccurate as I think they start letting people in around 8:00 and close the doors at 8:45.

The theater itself is your typical old (1930s?) 500 seat theater. Complete with the traditional, stained, flip up (and uncomfortable) metal and fabric seats. The seat numbering system is a little wacky too but easy enough to figure out. We had our seats in the third row near the center which was optimal.

When the MC came out to warm us up he gave the list of the nights performers and damn was I shocked. Not only was Patton Oswalt headlining but David Cross was going to be one of the opening acts! What? Two of my favorite comedians for the price of one? Absurd!

I laughed my ass off at nearly everyone except for Karen Kilgariff who is probably the worst comedian I've ever heard. I'm not saying she's not talented (as she really is the head writer for the Ellen Degeneres show) but just performed for the wrong crowd. She needs to open for Margaret Cho or Rosanne Barr. The crowd needs to want to hear about how difficult it is to be an overweight woman. Unfortunately, I am not one of those who wants to hear it.

Anyway, aside from Karen almost ruining the show David and Patton really killed. They both had completely new material that I had never heard (David Alan Grier needs to take note of this) and have a gifted comedic way of describing their observations.

Two thumbs up for stand-up at the Largo. I'll be doing it again.